Are the deaf fucking nocturnal?

Am sure you've all wondered this before yerselves.
Why the fuck are all the sign language things on so late at night?
I thought it was just people working nightshift and rowdy teens that were up this late! Clearly not.
And it's hogmany.
Starting on the bevvy in under 12 hours. CHAMPION!

Freaky Breastfeeding

BREASTFEEDING IS BETTER THAN A MANGO!!!
You heard it here first, 1:46 into the video.
Poor lassies hooked on the shit.
She'd rather have lots of breastfeeding than 1 million melons. That doesnt mean she's hooked. Just means she hates melons.
Wee tink.
I'd like to see how this lassie turns out in later life.
2 words - DYKE!

Christmas

I really don't think Christmas has been yet. Didn't feel like it.
But I hope all had a lovely night.
Drink, Take Drugs and Gamble makes one good Christmas for G.I Joe!

Late Advertising

I really don't see the point in companies advertising things late at night when there shops are shut.
Im watching t.v and an mcdonalds advert just came on, its got me really wanting a big cheese with bacon but I can't have one coz it's 20 past 1 and the closest one thats open is in glasgow!!!
Don't fucking tease me with visions of sweet delicious burgers if i have to travel 30 miles in the middle of the night to get one channel 4 ya cocks!

More School Lies

I've noticed it's not just the word wierd but word's like eight and weight also fuck the i before e rule.
We also learn in primary school that numbers start from 1 but in actual fact don't start or end.
so... WHAT THE FUCK IS THE ACTUAL POINT IN PRIMARY SCHOOL WHEN WE'RE TOLD TO FORGET EVERYTHING WHEN WE GO TO PRIMARY!!!!

X Factor Semi's

There are no words to describe how much I hate that wee fucking Ewok Fucking Needle Dick Owen!
Why the fuck is he still in. Even JLS are better.... JLS!!!!
I hope he dies in a train wreck or something.
Im watching the results as wee speak, to make matters worse ma wee love dianas oot!
Wee cunts just ran oot on stage, aw my DIE DIE DIE! FUCKING DIE!!!
WINGE WINGE FUCKING WINGE!!!
awww raging!
I think if i start drinking tonight I'd feel it was my duty to go find that wee rotten bastard and rip his arms off so i could beat him with them.
FUCKIN' AAAAH DIE!
I don't know what else to say.

One More Song

I bought the new guitar hero today and iv been playing since about half 9. It's now 3.44 am.
I'm sitting in my bed still playing, keep saying i'll play this song and go to bed and it doesnt happen!
Just one more song.
Just one more song.
JUST ONE MORE FUCKING SONG.
Apart from that, a very good purchase!

Drinking Age

I got interviewed the other week about my views on the drinking age raising to 21.

My answer was something along the lines of:

"I am fucking raging aboot the fact they are even thinking about this!

I've been drinking since a was about 15 and I'm no waiting aboot another 3 years till am legal again.

You can fucking shag aboot at 16 and get married, fight for yer country at 17 but ye cannie have a fucking drink to celebrate it all. Whit if i want a drink after a come back fae fighting the war and laying ma wife doon after a quick shag!

It's no ma fault wee 16 year olds are running aboot getting smashed on mad dog.

See if Gordon Brown or whit ever cunts in charge of this thing passing, watch yer back 'cause im coming for you, Roundhouse kick square tae yer chops!

End of!"

Sadly this didn't make the air due to too much "inappropriate" language.

All you MP's watch yer back! Am on to ye's!

Wierd or Weird

I know it's spelt weird but i refuse to spell it this way.
I really think it should be changed to wierd, otherwise everything I learned at school is a lie.
What happened to "i after e accept after c"?
If this isn't the case for this word, what else that Ive learnt at school is a lie?!
WHAT ELSE?!

Iyaaz

I've decided to make a blog to share my thoughts and all that jazz with all you lovely people out there.

I don't know how long this will last as it's mostly out of boredom, but we'll see how it goes.

Think the best place to start is about the dream I had last night.

It started off i was hanging about wae a family like the adams family and the wee boy was pure pissed aff after out team won volleyball. Then he pure wanted to play the computer but he never had one and he was trying to get me to go get mine. I was like fuck off am no gon tae glesga just to get ma xbox! He was a spoilt wee fanny.

After that the fuckin' misses was comin' on to me and she-was-a-fuckin'-belter!

Next thing I know am on their big coach gon tae tesco's but it couldny get by the road works so ma car ended up comin' oot the back and we drove in wae that.

I was rudely awoken next. This annoyed me coz i wanted to see what wierdo's like that would eat. I'd imagine it to be something pure strange like sardines covered in jam or a battered lettuce.

Anyone has any ideas fill me in eh?

Spoilt wee prick!